This Is What’s Missing in Your Heartbreaking Relationship: insights from Astrology and Tarot

October Astrology from a Tarot Perspective: Grand Trine in Water

Venus finds herself tossed between Mars and Saturn during the first ten days or so of October, the Three of Swords decan of the year. Venus is green with envy in Scorpio, but that’s nothing compared to Mars splashing hopelessly in Cancer and Saturn limping mystified through Pisces. The three produce a whirlpool of a grand trine in water. We can already see the formation of a heartbreaking relationship played out on the starry stage.

The Sun moves into the second decan of Libra on October 2, 2024. This decan is ruled by the disciplinarian of the planetary family, Saturn. While Libra represents partnership, Saturn brings about endings. The tarot card is the Three of Swords, titled Sorrow, which typically shows a heart pierced with three swords. What heartbreak is affecting you now? What partnerships seem to be coming to an end? Let’s see if the planetary movements describe what’s happening for you. Perhaps insights from astrology and tarot can show you what’s missing so you can heal your heartbreaking relationship.

The Three Heartbreaking Swords: Venus, Mars, and Saturn

During the first ten days or so of the month, our decan ruler, Saturn, is in a grand water trine with Mars and Venus. Saturn starts this story in the second decan of Pisces, ruled by Jupiter, the Nine of Cups. Venus rules the sign of Libra, and currently is in Scorpio (in the Sun-ruled second decan, the Six of Cups). Scorpio is ruled by Mars and serves as the sign of her detriment. Mars is in Cancer, his sign of fall (in the Mercury-ruled second decan, the Three of Cups) – both Venus and Mars are weakened. They feel lost and alone, and Saturn looms over them with his reaping scythe.

In mythology, Mars and Venus were lovers. Correspondingly, in the chart these two planets work as polarities: action and relaxation, separating and connecting, fighting and peacemaking. As polarities, they can be considered analogues of the two partners in any relationship. Exploring the placement and interaction of these two planets helps us understand the interaction of those attractive opposites.

Saturn is known for setting limits, commitment, and the ability to say no. When Saturn brings his boundary-making strengths into this counseling session with Mars and Venus, he reminds them of why they joined together in the first place, the necessities and resources they require to maintain their relationship, and when saying no will improve the connection. Does Saturn advise they stay together or break up? Saturn does appreciate endings, but because of his dedication to commitment, he has trouble letting go. Ultimately, Mars and Venus will work this out themselves, but Saturn reminds them of their foundation and helps them evaluate if it is strong enough to last.

Venus Finds her Independence from Heartbreaker Mars

Interestingly, with Saturn’s current retrograde and the upcoming one for Mars, those two planets will still be hashing out this same issue well into the first quarter of next year — and further, as we will see. It seems that the current relationship challenge has a lot to work through.

Meanwhile, Venus moves confidently forward, well past all the kerfuffle; that is until March 2025. She makes it all the way to independent Aries (advancing to the Sun-ruled Three of Wands decan), but perhaps Mars’s sway overcomes her in the end (he rules Aries after all). At this time, she will retrograde, rejoin Saturn in Pisces, and trine Mars, reopening negotiations. Does her desire for harmony overrule her need for independence? She finds her exaltation here in Pisces, and her compassion and love are profound, while Mars is still floundering in Cancer, his fall.

He’s been stuck in this quicksand this whole time. Or was he? Mars does make it out of Cancer and advances well into the Saturn-ruled decan of Leo (the Five of Wands) before he retrogrades in December 2024 – then he resolutely returns to Cancer to fight for home and family. Perhaps he is not so much stuck in the mud as offering his grand romantic gesture – standing in the rain and calling out to Venus to take him back. But does she? Should she? The story’s not over yet!

The Heartbreaking Relationship Healed: Venus and Mars Together Again!

So when does Venus finally reconcile with Mars? The first week of January 2026 – conjoined with the Sun’s bright confidence in Saturn’s sign of Capricorn and in Mars’s decan, the Three of Pentacles. Meanwhile, Saturn has moved forward to the third decan of Pisces, the Mars-ruled Ten of Cups, nodding his approval from a friendly distance.

So as the Sun moves from the Three of Swords decan and cycles around to the Three of Pentacles week well over a year from now, we see this fascinating drama played out. The Saturn-ruled card of heartbreak, the Three of Swords, gives us a chance to speak our no’s and set our boundaries for what turns out to be a highly productive interaction built on a strong foundation, the Three of Pentacles.

Three’s Company: The Surprising Solution to A Heartbreaking Relationship

Interestingly, the Three of Cups and Three of Wands both mark important points. The Three of Cups is Mars’s starting point (and what dragged him away from this relationship in the first place?). Mars is again in the Three of Cups decan when Venus reaches the Three of Wands. It is here, approaching but not yet reaching the breaking point of the square, that she relents and returns to Pisces, the wide open and generous trine where she re-opens the channels of communication.

Threes explore stability; a three-legged stool doesn’t wobble. Whereas relationships are twos – partnership and balance – the threes represent the addition of a negotiator. What is the mediator needed to bring stability to this relationship? Threes can represent the offspring of One: Self and Two: Other. Is this offspring literal? Or a metaphoric creation only this unique partnership can produce? They say that children can save a relationship, but if we focus our symbolic lens on that statement we realize that when a relationship is between only two people, it is a constant balancing act. When you recognize the mysterious third point – the all-important magical child of the relationship, then the two individuals become true partners as they work jointly to raise and care for what they conceived together.

This Is What’s Missing From Your Heartbreaking Relationship

Yes, Saturn represents endings and limitations. But he also represents structure and building. The tarot images give us insight into the astrological transits. The four threes represent the middle decans of the cardinal signs. Those middle decans are considered the fixed decans, or those that harness and maintain the energy. Like Saturn, they want commitment and longevity. Qabalistically, the threes are related to Binah, which is also Saturn but moreover, represents the mother, the one who creates new life. In the tarot Major Arcana, three is the Empress, maternal, fertile, beautiful. She corresponds to Venus.

What is missing from your heartbreaking relationship? The answer: What you’re building together. This is the third leg that provides stability. For young romantic couples, a child is often the culturally mandated answer. But for any relationship, we can instead look at this metaphorically. If each of you is building your own thing, in your own time and your own way, your relationship will eventually drift apart. But if you can build something together, it will support and maintain you. What is it? Whatever your heart desires — but has lost. This missing piece will heal your broken heart.

Heartbreak Help From Tarot and Astrology

Does this sound like a story that is playing out in your life? An astrology reading can help you find out how these heavenly dramas affect your personal chart and what challenges and resolutions might be coming up for you. Schedule now to gain clarity around your relationship, heartbreaking or otherwise. What solutions will the stars provide for you?

Prefer a DIY solution? Check out my Tarot Spreads for Love at Tarot In Love. Or see what tarot and astrology offerings are available at the Greater Seattle Tarot Meetup.